Annie, Chris and baby Thomas - Hypnobirthing working her calm magic
Baby TJ with his Mama
Magical connection from the start xx
Hi Dulcie,
It's easier for me to write out the details than record an audio for you - hope that's OK. Last night I got a stretch of sleep over 3 hours which was heaven, so taking advantage of being a bit more with it today to come back to you.
So - I think the very early stages of my labour may have begun on Sunday 10th July in the morning (not that I knew it at the time). My hands had swollen up so suddenly (I assumed due to the hot weather) that I was really quite uncomfortable and after trying every remedy and seeking advice from 111 I was booked into the urgent treatment centre at Poole hospital to have my engagement ring cut off.
After all that drama (and feeling a bit emotional about the state of my beautiful ring) we went to my in-laws for a BBQ. But I couldn't get comfortable, I kept getting up from the table to walk around complaining that the baby was kicking me really low down in my bladder. When we got home around 4pm I went straight for a nap. An hour later on my way to the loo my waters broke in a sudden rush.
I changed into comfy PJs, excitedly told Chris and called Sarah our Doula to let her know we'd be inviting her over later that evening. We knew it could still be a while so we made dinner and ate in front of the telly, chose a film and paid no attention to the mild cramps I was experiencing. When I felt they were coming more regularly I told Chris and he started quietly tracking my contractions using an app - not really keeping me informed at all. Chris started preparing our lounge for our planned home birth. Closed curtains, put music on, used our essential oil diffuser, lit the tea lights. We started up-breathing together and I focused on getting in the zone. I found the breathing really effective and standing or swaying, sitting on a yoga ball during the rests. When we were confident I was having 3 consistent contractions in 10 mins we called Sarah to come and labour line.
Labour line told us there were no home-birth midwives currently on shift but there would a shift change at midnight if I wanted to wait until then. I was so calm and comfortable at home, I was happy to wait. I started using my TENS machine as the labour progressed. But I never turned it up to the max. Just a mild distraction was enough with Sarah applying counter pressure on my lower back and Chris giving me lots of cuddles.
There is nothing quite like it..
Proud Daddy Chris enjoying newborn snuggles
At midnight the midwives were available but unfortunately the home birth couldn't go ahead due to ambulance capacity. The midwife on the phone assured Chris that there was a birthing pool room available and that it could be ready for me as soon as I arrived, they'd even get the water running. At around 1am we decided to abandon the birthing pool we were filling up in the living room at home and head to the Haven. The roads would be quiet and I wanted to do the car journey while I was still comfortable.
At the Haven everything remained equally tranquil. I was in the water almost immediately and time just flew. Chris and Sarah brought me snacks and drinks, reminded me to go to the loo, practical things like that. And in the stronger surges Chris would describe my favourite visualisations to me, repeat affirmations or count breaths. I was smiling and chatting and snoozing in the rests. I started using gas and air to take the edge off.
I was surprised when the urge to push came so soon. The midwife told me to go with it and I started down-breathing and allowing myself to get more vocal. I pushed through a second waters which felt quite powerful to me so I was disappointed that it didn't seem to signify the end was in sight. My birth plan had requested only essential vaginal examinations so I hadn't been tracking dilation at all. At this point the midwife asked to examine me as she suspected I might be pushing when my cervix wasn't quite ready. She explained the implications of this to Chris who coaxed me gently. I was 9.5cms and was asked to resist the urge to push and just breathe for the next hour.
This was a challenging point for us. All the energy went out of the room. I started to doubt my own stamina and asked for more pain relief (epidurals, the lot!) Chris and Sarah coached me out of the negative self talk. The midwife quoted my birth plan and saw that Remifentanil was my preferred choice of stronger pain relief. She explained this was an option but I'd need to leave the pool and transfer to the ward. I didn't want to do this and it spurred me on to stay put.
A while later I was examined again - 10cm and I felt like I'd been given a second wind. I was so excited to push again. The part of labour everyone seems to fear the most, I was desperate for. The sensations were intense but I was on a roll and really wanted to see my boy. I got to lift him out of the water just as I'd hoped.
What followed was a bit of a whirlwind. Delayed cord clamping was not an option due to concerns about my blood loss. I actually lost less than average but they couldn't be sure in the pool so better safe than sorry. For the same reason I had the injection to speed up placenta delivery which wasn't in my birth preferences but at the time I was informed and consented and was in full control. My bladder was preventing the placenta from passing so I was offered the option to use an in/out catheter or try pee myself. I tried but was a bit put off by the chord and clamps etc so resorted to the catheter, but I appreciated being given the option to try. All this time my son was having skin to skin with his Dad and Sarah was supporting me, holding my hand.
End to end - my waters broke at 5pm Sunday, we were in the Haven by 1:30am, Thomas James Kelly (TJ) was born 7lbs 1oz on Monday 11th July at 8:30am - 2 days before my EDD (13th) and we were discharged around 3pm.
I was always worried about the post birth recovery. I did have a second degree tear and some labial stitches. It wasn't nice being stitched up but under local anaesthetic, gas and air and a new found pride and respect for my body, I knew I could handle it. And 2.5 weeks on, I'm almost back to myself. My little tips for this 'stingy' phase would be... 1) warm water in a peri-bottle, not cold. 2) get a variety of maternity pads to try so you can choose the softest. 3) sit backwards on the loo - simple but effective! 4) indulge in some no-pants naps - let everything air for a bit!
Sarah captured some photos and videos of the birth and I was nervous to look at them because I didn't want to see pained expressions on my face or see anything that might contradict the positive memory I had in my head. I made Chris look first and describe them to me. I was worrying for nothing. I love the photos and the video of me lifting him out of the water is something I'll treasure forever.
I 100% credit hypnobirthing to my ability to stay so cool throughout (and come back from my wobble towards the end). By nature I'm quite highly strung. I've never got on with mindfulness and meditation, I never predicted I'd want a home birth and I'm far from anti-medication. I did the research, I read the books, I considered the stats and I knew an attempt to master this skill would significantly reduce the chances of some of the things I was scared of. And the more I learnt, the more it made sense. And it's a skill I know will serve me for life.
Your course was a huge part of my journey and I said before that I heard your voice in my head several times. You filled me with confidence that my body would know what to do - and it did.
I've already talked to Ellie quite a lot about the birth because she text me to say she was getting a little nervous. And Hayley came round for a coffee this week so have already shared some details with her. Feel free to use or pass on details of my story if you think it might benefit other clients.
Hope to see you at post natal yoga sometime soon.
Thanks again for everything.
Annie xx
